I’ve never been very smooth. When I was a kid, I was an awful liar. I envied my siblings’ abilities to get themselves out of jams (at least to my naked, admiring eyes) by being smooth talkers. I didn’t get that “gift.”
And then, like most people, I find I say things that I really, really shouldn’t. The kinds of things you look back at and think, “Oh, God, Jeff—what were you THINKING?!?!”
Call it foot-in-mouth syndrome, if you will.
Let’s switch gears, I’ll get back to the point.
I’ve dated one girl in my life, and while it didn’t last long, I learned a valuable lesson from our few months of dating:
A tough conversation isn’t going to kill you. In fact, it’ll probably help you. Even if the content requires brutal, awkward honesty, that honesty is always the best policy. The Bible backs this up:
Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. (James 5:16)
Confessing to each other leads to healing, so if you’re an idiot like I am and you say things you really shouldn’t, then here’s a clue: repent. Confess that to someone. (this is the point I was getting back to.)
It’s tough, it’ll hardly ever be easy, and it’s often going to be messy.
All this to say that perhaps the remedy to your tough situation in which you feel at odds with someone is not to hope they repent to you (even if everything indicates you’re in the right) but talk to them and repent of your own feelings of animosity or tension. Confessing heals.