I remember it quite well. It was a Thursday night, and I had run into some of my friends in Hastings. Suddenly, I felt my phone buzz.
It was my friend Crecey.
I can’t remember the dialogue, but she had invited me over to watch the second season of Chuck, because I was behind and the third season was on and we were going to catch up in time to watch season four as it aired.
So as soon as she asked me if I wanted to come over, I jumped on the idea. I apologized to my friends but told them I had been waiting for this, so I hopped in the car and headed to Berea. Little did I know that that night, I would finally hang out with someone I would end up fond of. (it’s not Crecey, she’s married, although I am fond of her in that friend kind of way.)
So this gal I met was pretty fabulous, and we got along well. her brother has been my best friend for years, but I never really got to know her, but at last we were hanging out.
I had no idea I would end up liking this girl. In fact, I always doubted I ever would, although I’m not sure why. To make a long story short, we hit it off and began hanging out in social settings very often, and once I got her number, the text-a-thons began. We texted almost literally all day every day, about everything. Stupid stuff, serious stuff, everything.
I liked this girl.
However, my problem was that I let everyone know that except for her.
I will skip the details and move on to the end for times sake. I had been trying to read between the lines and figure out all of the signals and stuff. People told me that they thought she liked me. The whole world knew I liked her. It was finally time to do something about it.
We hadn’t done anything together for a while (and keep in mind that we never did anything one-on-one, everything was social) and so I tried to be casual and ask her why we didn’t hang out anymore. again I will skip the details and simply reveal that she only wanted to be friends, and apologized if she gave the wrong signals or impression.
Now, every time that happens (which for me, that was the first) there’s always a choice to be made. We can move on and get over it, or dwell on it and let bitterness and unhappiness and all of that crap fester and stink. Fortunately (and I think it’s safe to say) God has instilled a bit more character in me than that. See, I’ve never dated a girl, and I don’t intend to put that on my Girl Resume. And it truly wasn’t the end of the world–I was just glad to find out the truth and that we are still good friends. We had a nice chat on the way home from a concert that a group from the church went to.
A couple weeks ago, I had a nice heart-to-heart talk with my pastors. I felt like it was time to say that I feel called to ministry (because I had had a bit of a chaotic week or two trying to figure out what I want to do with my life, what I want to major in, etc.)
In essence, I don’t feel a pull to anything else. I’m majoring in psychology, but I don’t really see myself doing anything with it. I will go ahead and say that my main intention for getting a college degree is to put it on a resume, because there is little doubt in my mind that some sort of pastoral ministry (be it worship pastoring, discipleship pastor or senior pastor) is in my future, and it’s what I WANT to do. What more rewarding career (and more challenging career) could there be than to see peoples lives be changed by the preaching of the Gospel and the advancement of the Kingdom of God? That said, I talked to my pastors and they said that there is with little doubt something available to do in the Foursquare movement (they also mentioned writing, putting Foursquare doctrine to books because it is scarcely done, at least that’s how I think they said it.) And they invited me to the district conference in November. I will get to hear from and spend time with Tammy Donahoo, Bill Mouer, and Glen Burris–the General Supervisor, our district supervisor, and the president of the Foursquare movement, respectively and it has really impacted me lately the seriousness of all of this. I mean, it’s amazing, but it’s a lot of responsibility. I sit and think about the fact that God is letting me be a part of what He’s doing in His church…and it amazes me. Because the Foursquare movement is doing great and exciting things–at least from what I can tell. Our church is getting ready to license some new people, college students are stepping up and becoming a part of the ministry in our church, and KWAM came to our church over the summer, resulting in several people hearing God’s call to plant a church, which will be happening soon. It’s so exciting.
Because here’s the thing.
Christianity is about moving forward. It’s dull and repetitive if we’re not serving, and doing something. That’s why I don’t mind being on worship team for six weeks in a row. Give me a break every now and then, but largely, I want to use what gifts the Lord has given to me to serve His church, and honestly, I enjoy doing what I know how to do.
So the whole growing up title of this blog can be summed up in this: I am a son. God has adopted me into His amazing family, and I love it. And I feel like it’s time for me to grow up and be more responsible, more professional, and more serious. And that’s honestly not something that I’m trying to make myself do. it’s something I’m getting the Lord’s help with. It’s a response: as I see the greatness of God and see what He’s doing in His church, I want to do everything I do better.